There is the Pulitzer. The Nobel Prize. The National Book Award. The Presidential Medal of Honor. Let’s add to that list please, if you will: The Cherry.
We are delighted to announce the winners of the first annual “Cherry” Awards, sponsored by the Cherry Red Report.
Please keep in mind these awards for spanking excellence are issued in the spirit of good humor and fun, and should not be taken too seriously. OK?
Anyway, Congratulations to all. You have won a coveted “Cherry’ which you can feel proud and warm and fuzzy about this honor. Your official “Cherry Red” trophy will be mailed to you post haste. And now, let us begin!
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Multitasking Achievement In a Spanking Video: The simultaneous mouth soaping and ass strapping video from Bad Tushy. Do not try this at home without adult supervision. Thank you.
Best Use of Daisy Dukes in a Spanking Video: Jade from Chelsea Pfeiffer’s “Good Spanking.” Masterful use of delightfully delicious denim daisy dukes.
Coolest Spanking Videos Shot in the Middle of Absolute Nowhere: RealLifeSpankings. Location: Various forests somewhere in The Netherlands and a few cornfields throughout the region.
Spanking Model of the Year: Amelia Jane Rutherford, whose grace, elegance, intelligence and gorgeous bottom make any spankosexual swoon. Her bottom is ommipresent.
Cutest Screen Name for a Spankee: Kissy Capri from Spanked Sweeties. In addition, Ms. Kissy Capri is also amazingly yummy, but what’s with the crazy tattoo? Zoinks. I am so digging the new Sweeties model Alannah Rae as well. Clare Fonda are you hiring Tops? I’m very Toppy.
Best Cornertime Photo Of All Time: Abi from SpankThatBrat. I think it’s her cute socks that seal the deal.
Best Dressed Male Spanker: David Pierson of Punished Brats. Is that Brooks Brothers or Bogotta Venetta ?
Very Funny Blog Award: The Spanking Spot. The always self deprecating and tireless blogger Mr. Brushstrokes has more funny quotables than any blog I have seen– he puts the fun in spanko. Check out his own Golden Buttocks awards!
Commercial Spanking Network With the Most Dizzying Amount of Sites: Spanking Online’s 14 sites. As of this posting, they may be up to 15……do I hear 16?
Yummiest New F/F Very Erotic Spank Site: Spank Sinn. One word: YUM. This was very close. Runner-up is the always exquisite Amber Spanks.
Comeback of the Year: The return of “Cherry” on Chelsea Pfeiffer’s Good Spanking website. If this was last year, my apologies. I am intoxicated.
Cool Spank-Blog [Text & Pix]: The Spank Statement. A heady blend of history, pop-culture, unique cultural-spanko blogging. i.e. A recent post dealt with priests who spank in a few classic B-movies.
Cool Spank-Blog [Text, Pix and Lotsa’ Videos]: Chross. How does this top-notch “Spankologist” find all these gems?
Cool Spank-Blog(s) [Text/Pix/Vids]: Richard Windsor: Frequent blogger, spanking party-goer, spanking interview podcaster, discoverer of very rare images and film. Richard aka: Houndog is an inspiration. He also recently spanked Audrey from spankthatbrat!
Cool Spank-Blog [Text Only]: Radspace. Rad thinks a LOT about this whole spanko thing. Always a thoughtful and engaging daily read.
Coolest Foreign Language Blog: Le fesseur. It will take you a year to catch up on these posts of rare clips and hard-to-find imagery.
Spanking Toy Retailer of the Year: Rosy Bottom. Retro. Vintage. Way cool.
Best NEW Spanking Implement Company: Cane-iac. Very promising weapons of bottom toasting.
Most Creative Video Scenario: Firm Hand Spanking’s scene involving a very stern master chef who cooks the bottoms of bratty female chefs Ms. Woodley and Ms. Rutherford. Hide your wooden spoons. Rump roast anyone?
Pervertable of the Year: Conair “Naturals” exotic wood hairbrush, available at Target. It’s made of bubinga wood. Makes a great stocking stuffer.
Most Promising New Site That I’m Very Excited About: Abi & Audrey’s “Spank That Brat.” Two lovelies sharing their love for each other and passionate spanks with us. Their blog kicks a*s too and is wonderfully written.
Most Original New Spanking Artist [M/f & F/f]: Klauth. An original vision.
Most Original Spanking Artist [M/m & F/m]: Franco. The most unique and original male-sub artist I have seen.
Book of the Year: “Dances with Werewolves” by Niki Flynn. Intriguing memoirs of a spanking model. Available at Amazon.com
Comment of the Year: “This Cherry Red Report blog is OK but can you do some video game reviews also, like for the Wii?” Jonathan from California. Erm…….WTF.
Most Original Pervy Furniture in Videos: Spanking Server. This is not even close. Where do they get all these wooden spanking benches and devices of discipline? And who is the devious mind behind it all?
Originality Award in Video Production: Pixie’s ‘Pixie’s Preview’s’ behind the scenes and quite humorous blooper reels from Punished Brats outtakes.
Largest Amount of Tushies in One Video Award: Clare Fonda’s “Exclusive Education Part 3” on Girl Spanks Girl. I’m already counting down the days until EE4: Brats Go Wild.
Kinkiest New Social Networking Site: FetLife. Will you friend me?
Best Use of Cherry Print Panties in a Photo Award: Amber of SpankAmber fame. Amber in cherry print panties. Life is good.
Heavy Hands Award: Dallas, of Dallas Spanks Hard. His iron hands can chop trees in half, it is said, and tan tails cherry red in 30 seconds or less.
Best New Vintage Site Award: Chelsea Pfeiffer’s “Good Spanking Classics.” Reviving vintage classics from the archives. I remember these vids when I was in college. That’s about all I remember tho.
Best Use of PJ’s in a Film: “Ghastly Amelia Jane” is a tour de force from Northern Spanking. There is certainly nothing ghastly about Ms. Rutherford’s sublime PJ-clad perky posterior getting dragged out of bed and promptly warmed to a glowing reddish hue. When her PJ’s get roughly yanked downwards, that is a cinematic moment to die for.
Hottest Spankable Naughties on a Non-Spanko Adult Site: LatinTeenPass. OK, OK I’m perv but who isn’t? Their almond, tanned glistening skin make me dizzy. I’m moving to Brazil. See ya.
Lifetime Achievement & Innovation Award: Shadow Lane. They paved the way for all of us. Thank you Shadow Lane.
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