Exclusive Interview: Zille Defeu on Double Rainbows, Zombies, Hairbrushes, Garden Gnomes, Lady Ga-Ga, Spanko Fiction, and More

We here at CRR are thrilled to present an exclusive interview with Zille Defeu, who is an absolutely fab fetish model, spanking star, top-notch photographer, sizzling writer, spanko blogger, super cool person, self-described “raging pervert” and so much more yummy goodness. *swoon* You can catch some of her spanking material on the Scottish spanking site Northern Spanking, which I believe is now officially called Scottish Spanking.

Anyway, I digress. I hope you enjoy this interview on all things Zille and otherwise. As always, my fellow spanky peeps, your comments and feedback are welcome and encouraged.

Thank you Zille for taking the time to chat with The Cherry Red Report. In your opinion, what is the best way to kill a zombie?

When you see the zombie coming at you, you take a special poison that attacks and stores itself in your braaaainzzzzz. Then, after the zombie kills you and eats your braaaainzzzzz, it will be poisoned by the “baited” meat. This, as far as I know from my extensive research, is the most reliable way to make sure the zombie dies. It involves self-sacrifice, sure, but when the zombie apocalypse comes, such things will be asked of us all.

I keep my poison in a special false tooth just for this purpose. It is my “final friend” because I should be well-past consciousness (although still alive enough to keep the zombie’s interest) when the zombie gets to me, so I won’t feel a thing as it rips me apart!

Have you ever made a puppet out of a sock?

I am profoundly ashamed to say that I have not. I imagine I will lose most of my fans with this admission!

Perhaps in a future spanking movie I can be spanked with a sock-puppet to make this up to my poor, betrayed fans…?

Who is Justin Beiber?

Well, I yesterday would have said, “Why don’t you tell me?” but last night I watched an episode of Graham Norton and the Beiber Himself graced the show. It was the best exposure I could have had to the wee lad, because Graham can make anyone seem reasonably real and fun.

So, to summarize: Justin Beiber is a wee little creature (who actually does look like some Canadian woodland creature, perhaps not unsurprisingly) who might think he is having a nice time now, but who will probably spend all of his ‘20s (and perhaps another decade or two) in therapy and having a number of high profile failed relationships with movie stars.

If he turns out to be gay and/or kinky, that might be the best thing for him! The self-examination required to figure that out about yourself might be his saving grace!

What are the chances that spankos will take over the world, eventually?

I think people with above-average IQs are usually kinked some way (if they are not normal in their intelligence, why should they be normal in their sexuality – the brain is the biggest sex organ, so if it ain’t normal, your biggest sex organ is thus not normal!) so I think there is a chance that, if enough “out and proud” smart folks manage to get in positions of power and/or influence, that the world could become a place that’s more understanding and accepting of spanking. That’s all the world domination *I* need.

Well, except for personal world domination, of course! When I run the universe, the spankos will have *arrived*! Now, I just need to manage world domination before the zombie apocalypse takes place…!

If thousands of birds started dropping from the sky, as has happened recently in Arkansas and Louisiana, what would you do?

Well, to be boring, I’d have to say that first thing I would do is to take cover!

However, once safe from the terrifying rain of birds, I would assume it was the commencement of the zombie apocalypse, and start my End Of Days preparations….

If you and Jesus had lunch, who pays?

If ol’ J.C. can’t stand me lunch, he really can’t hope that I’d even consider joining his religion! I mean, really! At least the Hari Krishna’s give out free meals!

I think you are really fabulous. I just wanted to say that.

Erm. [blush] Thank you! You know, a girl never gets used to that. And never gets tired of it, either!

Read on your bio you once worked at a peep show –what was that like?

I LOVED it. It was one of best years of my life. I learned a great deal about people, and about myself.

I learned how to deal with people who are acting badly (a big part of working at a peep show is pure customer service training!) and how to never be intimidated by men.

And I had some simply amazing experiences in learning to appreciate myself through the eyes of others.

I loved being in college, but I have to say I got way more useful life skills education at the peep show. And made some amazing friends who have stayed with me through the rest of my life.

Do you think all hairbrushes should gathered and destroyed?

To be honest, I’ve only had one hairbrush ever used on me! And it was in a custom video (so no one will ever see it, bwahahaha!) for a guy who didn’t want the spanking to be “too hard” – so thus far, to my experience, hair brushes are lovely multipurpose things, with a bad rap!

Although I hate-hate-hate the paddle, so I do wonder if I will also come to hate the hairbrush just as much!

On the other hand, I have come to value things that can be really intense and make me cry, without leaving marks. (Having to not be marked is the one downside to modeling!) So if the hairbrush could yield such results, I might become quite a fan of it.

How old is pop star Cher?

It’s like how many licks it will take to get to the centre of a Tootsie Roll Tootsie Pop. The world may never know.

Have you ever collected those little stickers that are on fruits?

Yes. So far my collection stats are: 13,007 banana stickers, 4,604 assorted melon stickers, 3,018 apple stickers (sorted by red, yellow, and green types), 1,776 nectarine stickers, 777 papaya stickers, 666 persimmons stickers, 543 pomegranate stickers, and a few smaller but cherished collections like star fruits, guava, tamarinds, and the piece de résistance, a durian!

You said in email that you were kinda’ a ‘geek’ — how are you geeky? 🙂 I like geeks btw.

Does the last answer not give you all the information you need? [grins]

Seriously, I was a bookworm (with big round glasses and no friends) growing up. Am now a bookworm-flavoured computer geek. I’d rather be home watching Star Trek or Dr Who than actually going out and socializing, most nights. (Unless I’m going to a Dr Who convention. I could go out every night for such rockin’ good times!)

I’m one of those people who still quite happily reads children’s fiction with as much enjoyment as I would any “grown up” book. (This may be due to the fact that I have so NOT grown up!)

I also really miss being in school, and I set myself all sorts of projects and actually study various topics all the time. I find this much better than being in school actually was, because I only spend time on stuff I know I’m interested in….

But on the other hand, there may be a good deal I miss both within the topics in question, and in not being forced to focus on stuff I might otherwise never know I’d be interested in. So I do miss having teachers. And, since I’ve always “gotten off” on the teacher-student power dynamic (it’s one of the most fun power exchange scenarios in the world of kink!), I miss having that as a regular part of my life.

See huge geek. I think about stuff like this.

If you could be a snack item, which one would you want to be?

This is the hardest question, by far! I would want to be addictively tasty, but would want some nutritive value at the same time. I’d certainly want chocolate to be involved in some capacity. But I’d also like to be a bit lip-smackingly salty, as well.

I shall leave it up to readers to decide what snack item I am. I wouldn’t want to step on their ideas of me and my snacking potential.

What in your opinion, is the most bizarre and strange fetish?

Ha! One that must be beyond even my own strange and bizarre imagination, I feel sure! Some favourites of my own (not ones I have, just ones I find fascinating) are the women-sinking-in-quicksand fetish, and the “looners” (balloon fetish) who are anti-popping. (When you think about it – their fetish is actually surface tension – how cool!)

I’ve also found in my experiences shooting for the cannibalism website MukisKitchen.com that cannibals are simply lovely people – not something you’d perhaps expect at first, certain serial killers having given the cannibalism community such a bad name!

Lady Ga-Ga recently dropped trou and displayed her backside via a twitter pic. Your thoughts?

I went and looked at the picture – my only thought was: “She has quite a nice bum!” I was surprised, actually, as I thought she might be too skinny to have a diverting bottom.

The currently lottery in Massachusetts is for over $300 Million. How would your life change if you won?

My biggest fantasy is to buy some land and build a multi-building homestead centered on an atrium with pool and hot-tub, and invite my dearest friends to live with me, paying what they could afford into home upkeep. Basically, to be able to give my nearest and dearest a place they can always call home, if they feel like being there. They could be an active part of the family, or visit once a year, but they would always have a place to go. (And I would have my friends around me, sharing my life. So in the end it’s all about me!) [grins]

Do you sing in the shower? if so, what songs?

Oh yes! I love singing. I keep intending to make time in my life for voice lessons, but then I just get caught up in more writing and photography projects, and it never happens.

In the shower, I’ll happily sing anything from David Bowie to Queen, from Lily Allen to Nina Simone, from Sisters of Mercy to Scissor Sisters, from Einstürzende Neubauten to the Oliver soundtrack. A big old mixed bag of obscure and quite common, with only inscrutable personal “taste” to explain any of it.

Name a celebrity you’d like to have a drink with.

Neil Gaiman. And I’d buy *him* lunch!

Are you writing any new spanky fiction these days?

Actually, I’m working on a novel, so that’s taking up most of my fiction-energies these days. But I do tend to put out a spanko fantasy every few months on my blog, just because I have so many spanking fantasies, and they need some outlet!

Can you do the moonwalk or a new dance called “The Spongebob” ?

My moonwalk is not all that inspired, and I shall endeavour very hard to never learn The Spoungebob (I have never recovered from the Macarena, you see, and I wish I could reformat the part of my brain that knows the Funky Chicken!)

However, I am very proud to say that I can do the Humpty Dance and the Ed Lover Dance!

Have you ever seen a double rainbow?

Have I just! Mr Defeu and I just got the opportunity to take pictures of a really proper double rainbow just the other day – It was amazing!

What celeb could use a good spanking right now? And would you be the spanker?

Hmmm. I think Olivia Wilde could use one. She’s just too hot for her own good, and probably needs regularly discipline to keep her humble.

Would I spank her? Um … yes yes YES!

On the other hand, if she felt the need to even up the score, I wouldn’t find that too dreadful to contemplate.

Do you like including those little smileys or animated gif’s(?) in emails?

I think emoticons can be vital in text-based communications, because people can’t see your face or hear your voice, and vital nuances can be lost. However, I hate those stupid little graphics (and don’t get me started on animated gifs!) I think that simple little text based emoticons are vital things. The others, however, are so annoying they may possibly even be a wee bit evil!

Is the world going to end in 2012?

Not unless there is a zombie apocalypse. But no one knows when that black day will dawn!

Do you have any garden gnomes?

Of course. I use them to display my fruit sticker collection.

Was sci-fi author Robert Heinlen a spanko?

Well, he was either a spanko or someone else wrote the spanking scenes and references that are in pretty much every book with his name on it. (Of which I have read every one!)

If you were a Star Trek or Star Wars character, which one would it be?

Oooh – another hard question! To be painfully honest, I’d just be a poor Star Fleet Academy cadet who gets roughed up (and possibly sexed up!) by Klingons and other hot aliens in every episode. My uniform catsuit would end up attractively torn and disheveled every time!

Also, just to pop into the other world, Han Solo really should feel free to dishevel me!

Is it true that latex does not breathe well?

It does not breath AT ALL. It’s latex – the material they use for condoms – it’s not supposed to let stuff through!

That said, it’s great for getting rid of water weight! Wearing a latex catsuit to a fetish ball is always good for losing 5 lbs instantly! [grins]

Do you like vintage [photography] cameras?

Love them. Want to own so many, but with all the money we put into our digitals, it’s hard to save for stuff I won’t use as often. At one point in time I found this wonderful used Rolleiflex, a camera I’d really love to own, but at that point I had enough money to buy either that OR a new laptop, and I had to be sensible and buy the thing that I could use for work, not just the lovely toy.

What is the exact last thing you most recently said to someone?

To be embarrassingly honest, I haven’t said anything to anyone all day! When I got up, Mr Defeu was already gone for work, and I’ve only communicated to people via email, text, and Twitter so far today. So the exact last thing I must have said would have been, “Sweet dreams, my darling husband!” (I was very happy with Mr Defeu because we’d just had some great spanking and sex!)

I shall make a point of calling my best friend when I finish this, so I will have actually said something in the not-too-distant future!

If you could meet in person with all your tweeter followers i.e. tweeple, would you do it and what’s the first thing you’d say to them?

Yes, I would – I have a good group of tweeties! First thing to say: “Yes, it’s ALL true!”

If someone wrote your biography, what would the title be?

Possibly, “She Had Her Cake And Ate It, Too: The Zille Defeu Story.”

Who would win in a fight? Superman or Batman?

Batman! Cause it’s about more than just muscle – it’s brains and a sexy outfit!??

Best movie you’ve seen recently?

I really enjoyed Tron Legacy. To anyone who complains about it, I say, “Watch the first Tron. It’s not like this was the highest form of the cinematic arts in the first place!”

What is your current ring tone on your cell phone?

Here the geekiness is confirmed for all to see: The opening to the Tom Baker Dr Who TV show! (With TARDIS sounds to start!)

Do you think Facebook is good or evil?

I don’t think it is special enough to rate full evilness. FB has its annoyances, but it has reconnected me with a couple dear old friends whom I thought I’d lost forever.

Who would you really like to just punch in the nose? [if anyone]

I would actually like to have a proper fight with someone (a good match – not someone in the wrong weight class, or able to kick my ass in five seconds – or I theirs) before I get too old and decide it would be a bad idea. I just really would like to let go and not care – just that one time.

I did actually have a great wrestling match at my first Shadowlane party – beat two girls, one after another – until they ganged up on me together. I still maintain that I won, since it took two of them to take me down.

Do you have a secret talent? if so, what is it?

Is it not enough that I get spanked on the internet, and share all the details of my perversions? What more must I do for you people?! [wide grin]

You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society, ruled by Zille. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place?

Well, the boringly obvious answer is, “Zille’s word is law. Her decisions are final.” But that’s because if you are going to actually run a society, you have to have some final authority.

But there would be other, more fun rules, like “The worship of Zille’s bottom must be observed daily. Zille accepts offerings of spankings and massages and ritual bathings with scrubbing salts. O you may devote your life to the worship of Zille and do any service she requests.”

At least *I* think that would be more fun!

What is the song on your iPod [or cd collection] that you are most embarrassed to admit having?

I’ll do you one better and even admit that Mötley Crüe’s “Kickstart My Heart” is my favourite workout song!

Thank you very much for your time Zille!

This was very much my pleasure, Dave! Thanks for the wonderfully fun questions!


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9 thoughts on “Exclusive Interview: Zille Defeu on Double Rainbows, Zombies, Hairbrushes, Garden Gnomes, Lady Ga-Ga, Spanko Fiction, and More”

  1. What the F was that?!

    Dave: your interviewing style is like a nervous sophomore on a first date with a cheerleader, stretching to talk about ANYTHING and EVERYTHING except intimate topics.

    Seriously, this interview does not belong on a spanking blog, and could’ve appeared on any random website. The fact that Zille is a gorgeous spanko, and the handful of tepid spanking-related questions notwithstanding, seems to have no bearing on the interview at all.

    How did you prepare for this interview? It seems like you found a templates MySpace dating survey for teens, rather than actually doing your homework to understand who Zille is, or to bother for a moment to think about what your spanko audience might really want to read. “Do you sing in the shower?” are you fucking kidding me? Who cares?!

    Step up your game, do your homework next time, and never again submit such lazy work.

  2. Anon –
    Actually, I really enjoyed those questions, and it was a nice change from being asked the same things about spanking over and over again. (“What is the implement you hate most?” “How did you get into spanking?” etc.)

    Not only did I have *fun* doing this, but the readers found out a great deal about me – more than they would from just spanking questions. I am a private person, and I gave away a lot about myself, very personal things, in those questions.

    Spanking is what we’re all here for. But it’s not the only thing in the world. If you really want to know about me and spanking, you can just read my blog. But here, Dave dug a bit deeper, even if it just reads like fun and games.

    I would be quite curious, Anon, to see your questionnaire, and to see if it was more enjoyable and interesting than Dave’s….

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