The Cherry Red Report has promoted Dakota South (pictured left), who will head up “WordPress Database Design & Development” responsibilities at the blog, and is no stranger to a cherry-reddened backside.
In addition, Kari Sweets (pictured below) will take on the new position of “Behavior Modification Researcher.”
[I also will be announcing a “Dept. of Daisy Dukes Research” position shortly to assist at The Daisy Dukes Report.]
“Dave clearly needs serious help with WordPress coding, as he has not a clue. Earth to Dave–anyone home?” said Dakota South in a statement to the blogosphere. “His SQL database is all mucked up and the PHP template is not xHTML compliant. Duh!”
[In addition, we are now looking to hire an “Assministrator” to assist with general office tasks. Inquire within. The Cherry Red Report is a certified EODE: Equal Opportunity Disciplinarian and Employer. Office attire is business casual, i.e. plaid and tartan skirts, skin tight jeans, daisy dukes, knee socks, etc.]
“I’m happy to be a part of this team, though I’ve spent far more time sleeping on my tummy than I had previously thought possible,” said Kari Sweets in a statement, while rubbing her perky backside and skimming “WordPress For Newbies.”
“I’ve learned a lot from Dave about…errm….well, his firm hand, naturally, and also things like, you know, diligence, responsibility and old-fashioned, firm but fair discipline. But I’m psyched to help this blog grow and expand. Even if I get spanked when I need it.”